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humor The Hard Times 2026-07-12

Punk Legend Ditches Decades of Funk for a Shower, Risks Normie Acceptance

In a shocking twist that's shaking the punk scene to its core, a crust-punk legend known as 'Squirrel Bones' has actually taken a shower. Experts warn this hygiene heresy could disrupt his delicate ecosystem of lice and fungus, and worse, might attract women with 401Ks.

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