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humor The Onion 2026-07-04

Founding Fathers Hover in Space, Proudly Oversee America's Descent

Apparently, our Founding Fathers have ascended to a higher plane of existence, specifically outer space, to wish America a happy birthday. From their celestial perch, they're showering us with love and pride, despite the fact that their current view likely includes a lot of questionable decisions and satellite debris.

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