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humor The Onion 2026-06-26

Study: Mosquitos Prefer Victims Branded With Mosquito God's Rune of Punishment

Scientists have discovered that mosquitos are extra attracted to people marked with a special 'rune of punishment' from the Mosquito God, proving that divine retribution is apparently the ultimate mosquito repellent. So, if you plan on being outdoors, just make sure you haven't offended any winged deities lately.

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