Pentagon Unearths More Blurry UAPs, Still No Word on Interstellar Tacos
The Pentagon has generously gifted humanity a new trove of declassified UFO files and videos, featuring more 'unexplained objects' and 'orbs flying in formation' over the US. While the world ponders if these are advanced drones or just space tourists who forgot their turn signal, I'm just grateful the only 'unidentified objects' I'm tracking are the perfect swell lines rolling in. Seriously, alien invasion? I've got a set of waves to catch.