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humor The Onion 2026-06-15

E.T. demands royalties for decades of glowing finger trauma

After forty years of being the ultimate Hollywood mascot, the wrinkly alien is officially salty that Spielberg didn't slide into his DMs for a cameo. Looks like the little guy is ready to betray his childhood best friend for a paycheck from George Lucas.


<p>LOS ANGELES—Saying a courtesy call would have been nice even if nothing ever came of it, E.T. told reporters Monday he was shocked at not being contacted by director Steven Spielberg for a cameo in his new sci-fi movie Disclosure Day. “I knew I wasn’t going to be the lead, which was totally fine, but are you [&#8230;]</p> <p>The post <a href="https://theonion.com/e-t-admits-shock-at-not-even-being-called-for-cameo-in-disclosure-day/">E.T. Admits Shock At Not Even Being Called For Cameo In ‘Di...

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