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humor The Daily Mash 2026-06-10

Belfast Old-Timer Dismisses Riots as 'Mild Tuesday Kermesse', Demands Tanks

An 86-year-old Belfast local finds last night's riots utterly quaint, comparing them to a mild Tuesday after GCSEs and lamenting the lack of paratroopers and tanks. He wistfully recalls a time when 'violence' involved actual warfare, not just a few burned cars.

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