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humor Duffel Blog 2026-05-29

Defense Secretary Claims He's Not the Worst, Cites Deadlifts and Regime Changes

Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth argues he's superior to past leaders, boasting about his physical fitness and unauthorized regime changes. He dismisses concerns about 'rules of engagement' and 'international law,' preferring a doctrine of 'FAF0 backed by overwhelming known violence' against military-aged males. Because who needs diplomacy when you have dumbbells and a thirst for chaos?


Pete Hegseth says critics fail to appreciate his commitment to lethality, vibes, and unauthorized regime change <img alt="Opinion: I am not the worst secretary of defense ever" src="https://storage.ghost.io/c/fa/9c/fa9cd1d4-6369-4dde-bbf0-3755aa4734dc/content/images/2026/05/55278063177_8ee4bdf958_k.jpg" /><p><strong><em>The following is an opinion piece by Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth.</em></strong></p><p>Everywhere I go, people keep calling me the worst Secretary of Defense in American histor...

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