In a move that surprised absolutely no one who has ever been in a relationship, a local wife has declared her love language is *all five*, leaving her poor husband to embark on a daily guessing game of affection. Apparently, 'Acts of Service' today might be 'Words of Affirmation' tomorrow, and who knows what surprise 'Quality Time' will entail?

<img src="https://media.babylonbee.com/articles/6a160afbf08016a160afbf0802.jpg" style="width: 100%;" width="400" /><p>PROVO, UT — Local wife Allie Goodman told her husband that she identified with all five of the common "love languages," and she was not sure which one she wanted today, but he was just going to have to guess.</p>