In a move that has left the LA Puente community utterly flabbergasted, their local high school's valedictorian has defied all expectations and demographic predictions by not being Asian. Apparently, excellence knows no ethnic bounds, much to everyone's surprise.

<img src="https://media.babylonbee.com/articles/6a160627c7b896a160627c7b8a.jpg" style="width: 100%;" width="400" /><p>LA PUENTE, CA — Bucking years of tradition, the valedictorian at a local high school is reportedly not in any way Asian.</p>