Americans are apparently obsessed with enormous, bland, freezer-burned blackberries and are begging companies to keep producing them, even at inflated prices. Who needs taste when you can have a frosty, golf-ball-sized disappointment?

<p>WASHINGTON—Stressing that they couldn&#8217;t get enough of the bland icy husks that crumble apart in their mouths, the American people reportedly begged frozen fruit companies this week to keep the giant flavorless blackberries coming. “If you can keep making bags of ice-caked blackberries with no taste whatsoever, we’ll take everything you got,” said Nevada resident [&#8230;]</p> <p>The post <a href="https://theonion.com/nation-begs-frozen-fruit-companies-to-keep-the-giant-flavorless-blackb...