The esteemed Cannes jury, apparently bored with existential dread and artistic nuance, has been caught sneaking off to watch 'Mortal Kombat II'. Lead by Stellan Skarsgård, they were last seen trying to avoid detection, desperately seeking a decent fatality after a week of pretentious cinema. One can only imagine their collective disappointment when Thierry Frémaux sat directly in front of them, blocking their view of Sub-Zero's ice clones.

<p>CANNES, FRANCE—Glancing over their shoulders to make sure no one was watching them leave, the Cannes Film Festival jury reportedly sneaked off Tuesday to watch Mortal Kombat II. “Come on, no one’s looking, just go,” said actor Stellan Skarsgård, who ushered the rest of the jury members through an emergency exit door and down a [&#8230;]</p> <p>The post <a href="https://theonion.com/cannes-jury-sneaks-off-to-watch-mortal-kombat-ii/">Cannes Jury Sneaks Off To Watch ‘Mortal Kombat II’ </a> appea...