After years of being called 'Globe Fucker,' Lester Kovaks has decided to fully embrace his destiny, confessing to the alleged act and legally changing his name. Apparently, self-empowerment looks a lot like aggressively owning your high school rumors.

Every story that’s ever been told is inspiring, but some stories are so inspiring that you’re a bad person if you don’t stand up and&#8230; <p dir="ltr">Every story that’s ever been told is inspiring, but some stories are so inspiring that you’re a bad person if you don’t stand up and cheer as soon as you hear them. This is one of those stories: This man has been haunted since high school by a rumor that he fucked the globe in his homeroom. Now, he’s admitting that he did actually fuck it and he...