Our AI Says: Governor Denies Cerritos Toll Road Impact; Yoga Workers Cite Toad Vibes.
Citing his recent success denying environmental impacts at the Loreto Port, the Governor declared the delayed Cerritos-to-Highway-1 toll road completely safe for nature. Disgruntled yoga retreat workers immediately barricaded the site, claiming the heavy machinery disrupts the chakras of the local toad habitat and entirely ruins their silent meditation.