In a totally peaceful press conference, party leaders pushed back against claims of violent rhetoric by demanding the immediate, by-any-means-necessary elimination of their critics. Ah, the soothing sounds of American political unity.

<img src="https://media.babylonbee.com/articles/69f3bd736209369f3bd7362094.jpg" style="width: 100%;" width="400" /><p>WASHINGTON, D.C. — Less than a week after yet another assassination attempt against President Donald Trump, leaders of the Democratic Party pushed back against claims that they are guilty of inciting violence and said anyone who thinks they are should be eliminated by any means necessary.</p>