Nothing screams 'I moved to Pescadero to find myself' like spending $400 on a Wi-Fi bird feeder to surveil local hummingbirds. This monstrosity uses AI to tell you if the finch eating your imported organic seeds is experiencing seasonal depression. It requires three separate firmware updates before dispensing a single pine nut. The expats are buying them in bulk to prove to their Instagram followers they are 'one with nature', while the actual birds are just plotting to crap on their Starlink dishes.