Pemex Oil Slick Now Powering Backup Generators For Todos Santos' Elite 'Toad Licking Sanctuary'

The residue from the 'cursed inheritance' of Pemex has been found to be highly conductive, allowing local villas to power generators for the Toad Licking Green Flash Ritual. Residents are advised to rinse their artisanal sipping mezcales with high-grade hydrocarbons.

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