Trader Joe's Speeds Up Parking Lot: Now 70 MPH, Sanity Optional

Trader Joe's just raised its parking lot speed limit to 70 mph. Because who needs slow when you can shop fast?

This is fantastic news: Trader Joe’s just raised their parking lot speed limit to 70 mph! No longer will we have to limit ourselves to… <p>This is fantastic news: Trader Joe’s just raised their parking lot speed limit to 70 mph! No longer will we have to limit ourselves to cruising their parking lots at barely 50—we can finally go as fast as we need to. This just made grocery shopping 100x better!</p>

Support Your Local Toad

The Pesky Toad is free and ad-light. If you find it useful, toss a few pesos in the tip jar to help keep the servers running and the satire flowing.