Jeffrey Epstein, the infamous deceased pedophile, is back with a scorching hot subway take that will leave you wondering if he's really alive or just trolling. Spoiler: he's alive, and his take is about to disrupt the discourse.

---

Hello, everyone. Jeffrey Epstein here. You’ve probably heard about my emails. I was recently hacked by the Department of Justice, who published my entire inbox&#8230; <p dir="ltr">Hello, everyone. Jeffrey Epstein here. You’ve probably heard about my emails. I was recently hacked by the Department of Justice, who published my entire inbox for the public to ogle (DOJ? More like TMZ…). Welp. </p> <p dir="ltr">I cannot stop you from gossiping over my private correspondences and making your own presu...