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humor The Onion 2026-10-23

Powerball Now Requires 2,000-Word Essay To Ensure Your Poverty Remains Holistic

Nothing makes a purely random lottery win feel more fair than writing a 12-point, MLA-formatted essay about your identity. It’s a bold move to evaluate a candidate’s 'qualification' to get lucky, because clearly, the best winners are those who can cite their sources while being completely broke.

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