The cybercrime collective threatening to leak a massive build of Grand Theft Auto 6 officially threw in the towel after their required memecoin milestone completely flatlined. Here in Todos Santos, the local Wi-Fi drops out if a pelican looks at the router funny, so the idea of downloading a 200-gigabyte game file sounds like a sci-fi fever dream anyway. While Silicon Valley crypto-bros cry over missed liquidity pools, we're just hoping the local Pemex station starts accepting pesos instead of whatever vaporware these hackers tried to shill.