Neuralink Pet-Translator Headband: Listen to Your Rescue Golden Retriever Judge Your Life Choices
This invasive brain-computer interface translates your rescue hound's inner monologues directly into an iPhone text feed while you drink morning cold brew. Local remote workers in Todos Santos wept openly upon learning their dogs think they are mediocre at best and deeply annoying. It turns out universal animal communication is just hours of complaining about kibble and lack of air conditioning.