Some wizard hacker managed to trick a cross-chain bridge into minting 116,500 fake rsETH tokens out of thin air, making off with nearly $300 million while everyone was distracted by the surf lineup at Zippers. The silicon valley geniuses are currently writing lengthy post-mortems about RPC node vulnerabilities, but down here in Baja we treat losing money with the dignity of a stranded whale. Who cares about multi-chain liquidity contagion when the local tacos are fifty pesos and the Wi-Fi has been dead since Tuesday?