Silicon Valley’s favorite doomsday prophets have finally decided to self-police, because nothing screams accountability quite like letting the arsonists design the fire department. Meanwhile, down here in Baja California Sur, the swell at Cerritos is firing overhead, the Tecates are cold, and local fishermen remain blissfully unbothered by whether an LLM can pass a middle-school ethics quiz. Back in San Francisco, the billionaires are weeping into their soy lattes over recursive self-improvement while our biggest existential crisis is wondering if the beach taco stand ran out of guacamole.