humor
The Onion
2026-09-11
MLB Adds Tragic Backstories to Baseballs to Make Foul Balls More Emotional
MLB is finally fixing the problem of fans feeling indifferent toward flying cowhide by giving every ball a heartbreaking tale of immigrant struggles and terminal illnesses. Because a strikeout isn't truly immersive unless you're weeping for the ball's lost dreams before it hits the catcher's mitt.