The Cronos blockchain experienced an involuntary twenty-four-hour nap following a $74 million exploit on its Tectonic lending platform. Validators swiftly pulled the plug to freeze the damage, proving that nothing says decentralized finance quite like a few guys hitting the master power switch. Meanwhile, down here in Baja, the local Pemex station power went out for the third time this week, and nobody panicked because we don't rely on smart contracts to buy our Tecates.