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humor The Onion 2026-08-31

Centenarian Requests To Be Served As An All-You-Can-Eat Buffet For Apex Predators

After spending a century observing nature, this gentleman has decided that his final contribution to the circle of life should be providing a light snack for a snow leopard. Truly, a breathtaking way to ensure your obituary ends with a crunch.

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