Pentagon Declassifies Thermal UFO Files While Baja Sur Locals Ignore Everything for Dos Equis
The U.S. government just unloaded another batch of declassified files detailing thermal cameras tracking slow-moving, 'black-hot' infrared anomalies over mountain ridges. International conspiracy sleuths are losing their minds over impending alien disclosure, but out here in Baja Sur, the only unidentified flying objects we care about are pelicans kamikaze-diving into overhead lefts while the surf pumps relentlessly.