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humor The Daily Mash 2026-08-28

Aging Rock Legends Price Tickets Based on Imminent Mortise

Legacy acts like the Stones and Bob Dylan are cashing in on their own mortality, charging small fortunes for tickets because fans are terrified these might be the last shows before the afterlife. It’s comforting to know that even on the brink of retirement, these legends still prefer our wallets over our hearing.

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