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humor The Beaverton 2026-08-26

Dolly Parton finally achieves the impossible: World peace among baristas and conspiracy uncles

In a miracle only a rhinestone-encrusted saint could facilitate, the divide between artisanal oat-milk pourers and Facebook-meme-wielding uncles has vanished. Turns out, the only thing powerful enough to stop a culture war is the collective realization that we’d all be lost without Jolene.

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