humor
The Daily Mash
2026-08-12
Celestial Event Sued for Failing to Provide Total Heartbreak
Astronomy enthusiasts are outraged that the moon couldn't be bothered to completely block the sun, calling the partial eclipse a disappointing and lackluster homage to Bonnie Tyler. Apparently, if the sky isn't going to turn black and trigger an existential crisis, it shouldn't bother showing up at all.