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humor The Daily Mash 2026-08-12

Middle-Aged Man Nearly Perishes After Accidental Exposure to Modern Pop Music

Poor Martin’s fragile, aging eardrums went into immediate shock upon hearing a contemporary beat, proving that anything released post-2005 is essentially a biological weapon to the middle-aged. He is currently being stabilized with a strict, life-saving drip of 90s alternative rock to prevent any further exposure to relevance.

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