Senators Elizabeth Warren and Richard Blumenthal have officially requested that the SEC investigate the $TRUMP memecoin, pointing out that nearly a million retail wallets lost close to $3.8 billion while the token crashed 98% from its all-time high [1.2.4]. Down here in Baja, the local gringo crypto bros are sweating through another generator failure while trying to calculate their unrealized losses over lukewarm Tecates. Honestly, nobody in Todos Santos gives a damn about Washington ethics probes when the overhead swell is chest-high and the CFE grid just flat-lined again.