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humor The Hard Times 2026-07-24

Metallica Hunts Down Bootlegger Who Sold Beavis His Iconic Shirt After 30 Years

After three decades of tireless searching, Metallica has finally sued the bootlegger responsible for Beavis's signature t-shirt, ensuring the integrity of their merchandise empire. The bootlegger laments the loss of his primary income stream, lamenting that Winger shirts simply don't move like they used to.

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