The SEC has rolled out a brand new regulatory framework dubbed 'Regulation Crypto Assets' to finally bring order to digital investment contracts. Down here in Baja, the local power transformer just blew for the third time this week, leaving us with zero electricity and precisely zero interest in federal safe harbors. While Washington bureaucrats argue over registration exemptions, the biggest concern on the beach is whether the guy selling Tecates out of a cooler takes pesos or digital tokens. Frankly, we'd rather trust a stray beach dog with our life savings than try to parse SEC compliance prose.